Guaranteed Or Your Memory Back Page 3

  “Yeah they are,” Dan said. His heart was beginning to calm down now. The more they talked the easier this seemed to be. Just two men out on a New York Summer day (early evening, he corrected himself) having a little chat about books. What’s the big deal? Besides he could easily outrun Jeff if he had to. Unless he’s crazy and has a gun, or some other insane thing. That was Elise talking in his head. And maybe out of spite, maybe out of curiosity, he took a few steps towards Jeff.

  “We don’t even have to go back inside. If you want, I can guarantee your memories right here and now, just say the word.”

  Squinting his eyes a little, Dan said, “Ok. Do whatever you do, if you can, from right there. I don’t believe—”

  Something interrupted him. It was a memory from his deep past. A memory he’d buried with a shovel and plenty of dirt, and it was so powerful and vivid that it turned the corners of his mouth down in an awful grimace. Bub had a smug smile and shifted his weight, his eyes gleaming unnaturally in this light.

  —

  Dan was six years old, it was late afternoon and he was playing with Legos. His mother was downstairs after a particularly loud make out session with her ‘secret man’. That same man, dressed in brown uniform and brown ball cap came into his room, dark stubble raged along his angular face, and his blue eyes so earnest and full of deadliness too. He was the mail man or something like the mail man, a tall guy who always smelled of cheap beer and cigarettes. This didn’t happen, Dan thinks as he stands in front of Jeff on the sidewalk in NYC. When did this happen? Can this be real? It’s so vivid…

  The secret mail man closed the door gently behind him and locked it. Just the two of them now and for some reason this guy always made Dan feel nervous.

  “Hey buddy,” he whispered, coming nearer. Dan’s little heart began to hammer a bit faster now.

  “Hi,” Dan said. He didn’t like this man but he was terrified of him. The first time Dan caught his mother cheating—which he didn’t know that’s what it was, he just knew only his Dad should play with his mom like that—the guy had nearly pushed Dan through the door and he’d been hurt, especially his feelings.

  “You didn’t hear anything today. Ok? Got it?”

  “I did hear it,” Dan said. He focused intently on his Lego bricks, snapping one bright red piece onto another dull white one.

  The man grabbed his little arm lightning quick and flipped Dan down onto his stomach. Somehow the man was holding Dan’s arm behind his back in a really uncomfortable position. The pain was bright and intense but he dared not scream for upsetting his mommy, but he had made a quick yip of surprise when he was brought down by the evil man.

  Then his other hand slid down to Dan’s small genitals and began rubbing and squeezing.

  “You didn’t hear anything, and if you say you did, you little shit for brains, I’ll tell your Mom what a fag you are.” Still pumping and squeezing his hand down there. The sensation felt wrong but also made his lower belly tingle, the mixture of sensations was overwhelming and sort of pleasant, and Dan was so scared and so caught up that he kept his mouth shut. He couldn’t breathe like normal and the man kept squeezing and shifting his hand around down there, his own private parts! This can’t have happened, did this really happen? Am I losing my mind? How is this possible? But I remember it now, it must have happened? Oh my God. No, no this can’t be!

  Dan closed his mind off to this, what a horrible memory! It was Jeff’s fault!

  * * *

  He snapped out of it fully, staring at the wretched man in front of him. Tears streamed down Dan’s face. Jeff was now looking on at him calmly.

  “I can give you more memories,” he said.

  “Fuck you!” Dan turned and began running down the street screaming the same expletive command over and over again.

  * * *

  Thirty seconds later a young woman by the name of Amanda came walking down the same street and heard and saw a young man running the opposite direction, screaming fuck you over and over again. She stopped just in front of the bookstore, Bald-guy was looking after the yelling man.

  “What’s wrong with that guy?”

  Bald-guy turned to her and smiled, his teeth a little too white, a snake tattoo running over and around his ear, which almost looked like it could strike out at her any moment.

  “Some whack-job kid. I chased him outta my store. Say, you like bargain books, young lady?”

  “Sure do! Are you open?” She craned her neck around at the front of his store, her face a little dubious.

  “Come right on in. I have a special return policy in case you’re interested…”

  His smile and too white teeth seemed unreal, but she entered in without question.

  DEDICATION

  To you, dear reader. I’ve got one hell of a bargain for ya…